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Learning in
the Real World
by Wendy Priesnitz
A retired school teacher
acquaintance recently acquired her first computer. After plugging it in and
connecting the components according to the instructions, she called me to ask
if I could recommend a course that she could take to learn how to use her new
toy. I said I couldn’t recommend a course because I’ve never taken a
computer course in my life. Then how in the world, she wondered, had I become
such a proficient computer user? Well, I responded, I just began using it!
I hadn’t given much thought
to it before, but I realized then that I learn most things by just doing them.
And I suppose that made me a good role model for our life learning daughters
when they were young…or at least it helped me understand that “just doing
it” can be an effective way to learn. And that, of course, is fundamental to
my philosophy of living and learning.
It’s also fundamental to how
all children learn to walk and to talk. They don’t take a course. They
don’t “goof off” while learning it because they’re bored or it’s too
hard. They are not marked, tested, graded or nagged to practice. They just do
it. They are motivated by wanting to do it well, like bigger people.
To someone dependent on being
carried or on crawling, walking must seem like a natural, easy and fast way to
get around. Their parents, older siblings and other walkers in their lives
have a mobility that they must envy, especially given their high level of
curiosity. And curiosity is motivating.
Aside from modeling the
behavior, we create a safe environment, putting breakables away,
toddler-proofing our homes so there are no stairs to fall down, no sharp
corners to bang against. And we provide nourishing food so they developed
straight bones and strong muscles.
We unconsciously encourage and
stimulate them to learn, bouncing them on our knee at first as they try to
push their legs straight against our stomachs, then holding them at floor
level and pretending they are walking, then holding out our hands just a few
inches in front of them, encouraging them to take those first few tentative
steps.
Then, when they finally take
those first triumphant steps, we celebrate the satisfaction of accomplishment
with them. We also reassure them when they have a setback, cuddling them when
they fall, patching up a scratched knee, encouraging them to try again. And
reassuring them they can and will eventually walk.
But perhaps most important of
all, we trust them to learn to walk. Unless they are severely disabled, we
don’t think twice about whether or not they will learn to walk. People walk,
so we know our children will eventually do it too. We take it for granted. We
just let them get on with it, as we do the same.
We don’t worry that we might
need a degree to help them learn this important and difficult skill. We know
that we’re up to the task and so are they. They do it experientially, from
real life, motivated by a real need. And they work hard at it. In fact, they
relish the challenge to learn and put a lot of self-discipline to work on
whatever they choose to learn.
In the same way, a child will
teach herself the language spoken by the adults around her. And that same
child can later learn to read it. She will do that as part of her real world
experience – speaking and reading for real-life reasons.
Let’s take another example,
this time looking at how a child just off the breast or bottle learns about a
cup. As she uses it, she makes many discoveries: What it is, what is its
substance? What are its attributes, what it feels like, tastes like? How is it
different from the last cup she used in texture, weight, shape and color? What
will a cup hold? How much will a cup hold? Is it better to hold it with one
hand or two? Where can cups be put down without spilling (and perhaps more
interestingly to a young child, with spilling)? What happens when a cup is
thrown across the room (first full, then empty)?
The child learns all this
science experientially, not because somebody teaches her or tells her she has
to learn it. She picks up the knowledge as part of her everyday life...in just
the same way that we adults learn things. She didn’t learn it because we got
inside her head to examine her thought processes...and whether or not she was
“doing it right” or even knew the name we’ve given to that type of
science. But she did challenge that curious notion that children have short
attention spans! (In my experience, they only have short attention spans when
someone is making them do something they are not interested in.)
But that sort of learning only
happens when we believe that it will and that it should, when we allow the
learner to be in control and give them enough time to “just do it.” We
need to give them the space to recognize or formulate a “problem,” set
about solving it, take it as far as they can go, consult with others about it
or observe them doing it, reflect on that and tackle it again. And we must
make the real world accessible to them so they can have real-life experiences,
instead of the sort where they are “allowed” to “help” within certain
constraints (usually relating to cleanliness and efficiency) or where they
pretend to do real work with the aid of toy tools. Life learning is about kids
doing their own real work, motivated by their own real interests and
goals…and being around adults who are also doing their own real work.
Unfortunately, there are few
places where children can experience the adult world. Most children – and
even many homeschooled ones – don’t have nearly enough opportunities to be
with adults who are doing their own thing in the real world and not, as John
Holt once put it, “just hanging around entertaining or instructing or being
nice to children.”
The working world of adults is
not very accessible to children because we fear they will get hurt, get in the
way of or slow down production, or abuse or break the equipment. So we make
childhood a rehearsal for personhood, replacing real experiences with pseudo
experiences. Many of those pseudo experiences take place in schools, but they
can also be part of the home-based learning environment.
Our daughters Heidi and Melanie
grew up living and learning in the midst of our busy home-based magazine
publishing business. They used all the tools of that business and never abused
them. They respected the tools as part of our business and saw how carefully
we used them. And, more importantly, those tools were an important part of
their everyday lives too, so they had a stake in taking care of them.
But one of my homeschooling
friends, who also happened to be a writer, was horrified to discover that our
children were able to use my typewriter, then my word processor, then later my
computer, as well as various photocopiers, typesetters and other related
equipment. She said her kids would wreck hers for sure if allowed anywhere
near them. Maybe...or maybe not if given the opportunity and the trust.
There are many opportunities
for children and young people to learn in and be of service to the real world.
They include volunteering with community organizations, helping in their
parents’ businesses or at their workplaces, working for pay or as
apprentices at neighborhood businesses and running their own businesses. Our
daughters often they put all that office equipment to good use in their own
money-making enterprises...and they were noticeably more passionate about
those businesses than they were about stuffing magazines in envelopes for
their parents’ business!
Although I don’t want to
romanticize the past or ignore the abuses against children that took place a
few centuries ago, there was a time when children had the opportunity to do
real work at their parents’ side, as well as on their own accord, and to be
involved in the life of their communities. In our more complex modern world,
this same type of opportunity and respect for children’s abilities is still
possible if we all share a sense of responsibility for helping develop the
minds that will lead us into the future. In our current economy, no one has
all the experiences and information necessary to prepare young people for a
rapidly developing future. But we can share our skills and experiences with
our children, or take on other people’s kids as apprentices in order to pass
along our knowledge and skills.
That sort of real world
learning experience is often easier to describe than to arrange. A group of
parents have come together in a community park in Toronto to build a series of
cob structures housing a sink, cooking fireplace, baby-changing station and,
ultimately, a composting toilet with a rammed earth foundation. Cob is a
traditional style of construction that uses a mixture of sand, straw, clay and
water and is people-friendly, low-tech and community-building. Aside from
filling a need for those facilities in the park, one of the purposes of the
project is to offer people of all ages a chance to learn how to build low
impact shelter. And that includes children of various ages. But the municipal
bureaucracy has enforced labor code regulations, which required the building
of a six-foot-high fence and excluding the participation of children. Georgie
Donais, an unschooling mom who coordinates the project, has devised a
“workaround” whereby people mixing cob materials on tarps are located
outside the fence and only work booted adults are allowed inside the fence.
Besides segregating people by functions, this relegates children to the mixing
function and prevents them from being involved in some of the more
“exciting” aspects like shoveling, hauling materials or filling bags of
dirt. Georgie, trying to see the situation through the bureaucracy’s eyes,
admits, “I imagine it is a truly strange thing to be asked to listen to and
support some woman who wants to – with barely any money and very few power
tools, but with many bare feet and children involved – create a building out
of mud that houses a toilet.”
That “strange thing” is
something our children need much more of, especially if the well-meaning
powers-that-be (whether they are municipal officials, business owners or
parents) can sort out the mindless bureaucratic requirements from the
necessary safety concerns. Kids need the sense of accomplishment that comes
from being trusted with a real job to do in the real world. They benefit from
the increased self-esteem that comes from participating – at whatever level
– in a functioning group. Everyone benefits when kids develop the grace and
confidence that accompanies being in control of themselves and of their
their surroundings. And, of course, they don’t need the sort of
“protection” that results from lack of adult trust and preparation, and
that keeps them sitting on the sidelines and away from meaningful work.
Aside from safety, there are
other reasons for sidelining children. Showing respect for a child’s
developing skills takes patience and skills. Doing a task ourselves is usually
easier and more efficient than allowing the time needed for a child to do it.
Children’s results might be not good enough for the satisfaction of
perfectionist adults. And some people just underestimate what a child can do.
They may be the same people who
question how unschooled children will ever learn how to function in the real
world! Perhaps they misunderstand the concept of life learning, or maybe they
mean that the real world is a competitive, hostile and grim place – does
that mean it’s intentional that schools are so often such ugly places?! If
that’s the case, I’d have to say that not only do life learning kids have
the secure preparation of a joyous childhood to prepare themselves for
adulthood, they are able to observe, experience and celebrate the positive
aspects of life by interacting with friendly, supportive adults. And who
knows? That might be just the sort of childhood that’s needed to make the
whole world a better place!
Personal empowerment starts
with the realization of the value of our own life experience and potential to
affect the world – whether we are babies, toddlers, teens or adults. So as
life learners, we need to find as many ways as possible to nurture this
awareness of the value of experience in people of all ages. Our children
especially deserve the same flexibility, control, access and opportunities to
be part of – and learn from – the daily life of the families and
communities in which they live.
This essay
first appeared in Life
Learning Magazine, November/December 2007
copyright (c) Wendy Priesnitz 2008
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